Poker Through the Eyes of an Amateur

April 11, 2006


Poker Savvy said that they had been getting heavily spammed by people who want to get into this freeroll tonight. I didn't really think much of it, until I got home from work today. I was finishing up playing a game on my computer when I get this IM from someone trying to get the password to the game tonight. Below is an exact transcription of our conversation. The name has been changed to protect the retarded. Enjoy.

(17:16:59) donkey1: hi just im* when you get this thanks!: )
(18:01:43) Matt: do I know you?
(18:02:15) donkey1: im jenn!lol thanks for im*in me but okay you know how we are already registered for the tourney tonight?
(18:02:36) Matt: the freeroll?
(18:02:41) donkey1: yes
(18:02:44) Matt: yeah
(18:03:22) donkey1: okay well for some reason i clicked the grey box you know and it said unregistered from the tourney
(18:03:27) donkey1: and i created a new name so i dont have the pw
(18:03:29) donkey1: do you have it
(18:03:49) Matt: I'm sorry, I can't give that out
(18:04:04) donkey1: well i can prove im part of the tourney
(18:04:14) Matt: how so?
(18:04:44) donkey1: umm okay well look on your screen
(18:04:47) donkey1: on titan right
(18:04:51) donkey1: it shows the registered players
(18:05:18) donkey1: well my name is still on there but on mine it isnt cuz i just called my friend josh to see if it is
(18:05:31) donkey1: im badkatitude
(18:06:03) Matt: heh, now I know you're lying because I know her personally
(18:06:07) Matt: sorry I can't give you the password
(18:06:13) donkey1: damn haha
(18:06:17) donkey1: well what if i traded you pws
(18:06:19) donkey1: one for one
(18:06:25) Matt: no thanks
(18:06:30) donkey1: I PROMISE I WONT LEAK IT
(18:06:37) Matt: sorry no can do
(18:07:07) donkey1: why?
(18:07:14) Matt: rules are rules
(18:07:17) donkey1: imr eally not lying about what happened lol
(18:07:22) Matt: and I don't need an extra opponent
(18:07:23) donkey1: jsut the name cuz i had nothing else to prove it
(18:07:29) donkey1: oh so you want money?
(18:07:34) donkey1: what if i gave you 50 %
(18:07:38) Matt: lol
(18:07:43) Matt: sorry, no deal
(18:08:04) donkey1: well what do you want me to do cuz i really was in the tourney as a new member
(18:08:09) donkey1: and thats totally fair
(18:08:10) donkey1: right?
(18:09:15) Matt: sorry, you'll have to get in touch with PokerSavvy or Titan
(18:09:17) Matt: I can't help you
(18:09:33) donkey1: lol not for anything? so say you dont make the money are you gonna continue playing on titan?
(18:10:06) Matt: you're just wasting both of our time now
(18:10:12) Matt: I'm not going to give you the password
(18:10:15) Matt: try someone else
(18:10:20) donkey1: bye

No sooner had I brushed this guy off than I am IMed by yet another donkey, possibly the same person, but I doubt it as their English wasn't as good. I thought I would have a little fun with this one. I decided to give them a fake password and website. Check out the results below.

(18:13:36) donkey2: hello
(18:13:40) Matt: hi
(18:13:44) donkey2: :)
(18:13:46) Matt: do I know you?
(18:13:52) donkey2: hmm
(18:13:55) donkey2: not yet
(18:14:17) donkey2: i wont to bring you a deal :D
(18:14:24) Matt: oh?
(18:14:32) donkey2: you is a poker player if i right ..??
(18:14:45) Matt: yeah...
(18:14:49) donkey2: so ... :D
(18:14:54) donkey2: about titan
(18:15:20) donkey2: this savvy blogger FR
(18:15:27) Matt: yeah?
(18:15:48) donkey2: you reg there ?
(18:15:51) Matt: yes
(18:15:55) donkey2: ok
(18:15:59) donkey2: hmm
(18:16:06) donkey2: have you like a deal
(18:16:25) donkey2: exchange pw -> money if i won something ..?
(18:16:42) Matt: hmm...
(18:16:43) Matt: I dunno
(18:17:02) donkey2: what menan dunno ..?
(18:17:07) donkey2: :0
(18:17:32) Matt: why don't you just sign up yourself?
(18:17:38) donkey2: where ..?
(18:17:44) donkey2: I cannot find
(18:17:52) donkey2: or something ...:(
(18:18:01) donkey2: forum
(18:18:18) Matt: oh, they may have taken it down. Here, try the password: gottabesavvy
(18:18:54) donkey2: gottabesawy
(18:18:57) donkey2: ?
(18:19:05) Matt: no, it's two v not a w
(18:19:49) donkey2: hmm
(18:19:51) donkey2: lets try
(18:20:27) donkey2: is it correct ...??
(18:20:35) Matt: it should be. That's the one I used
(18:21:10) donkey2: hmm
(18:21:14) donkey2: not working :(
(18:21:23) donkey2: something is wromg
(18:21:25) Matt: hmm... I dunno what to tell you
(18:21:33) Matt: maybe they give each person a different password?
(18:21:46) donkey2: hmm not think so ..
(18:21:56) donkey2: anyway what a site is ?
(18:22:05) donkey2: maybe need to try that way ..?
(18:22:11) Matt: with the w?
(18:22:27) donkey2: i try v v
(18:22:29) donkey2: and w
(18:22:35) donkey2: incorrect
(18:22:36) Matt: hmm
(18:22:40) Matt: the site seems to be down
(18:22:43) Matt:
(18:23:09) donkey2: hmm
(18:23:17) donkey2: let's check it out
(18:23:19) Matt: sorry I can't be of more help
(18:23:26) donkey2: nope
(18:23:37) donkey2: site isn't working
(18:23:41) Matt: that sucks
(18:23:44) donkey2: aha
(18:23:48) Matt: well, I have to head to the store now
(18:23:55) donkey2: you is a member of that site ..??
(18:24:02) Matt: nope :-/
(18:24:10) Matt: anyway, I need to go
(18:24:17) Matt: cya!
(18:24:26) donkey2: ... anyway thanks ...:)
(18:24:29) donkey2: see ya

Unbelievable. Well, actually it is believable. And hilarious. Hope you got a good laugh out of it!


  • Yea, now these clowns are IMing me as well.

    By Anonymous mookie99, at 4/11/2006 7:04 PM  

  • Check this out...same guy as you...

    [18:09] themookie99:
    [18:10] donk: hmm
    [18:10] donk: kaellinn188
    [18:10] donk: wrigh me the same
    [18:11] donk: but this site isn't working ..:(
    [18:11] themookie99: probably because registration is now closed

    By Anonymous mookie99, at 4/11/2006 7:14 PM  

  • Hahahaha, Mookie that is just freaking awesome. Well done!

    By Blogger Matt Silverthorn, at 4/11/2006 8:03 PM  

  • Life is hard... It's harder when you are stupid.

    By Blogger Slimeface, at 4/11/2006 8:09 PM  

  • Classic! And to think you didn't even have to be in a hand with them to enjoy their donkiness. Where's Daddy when we need him?

    By Blogger iamhoff, at 4/12/2006 4:21 AM  

  • Hey guys,

    Matt from PokerSavvy here. Funny stuff. So amazing the lengths people will go to.

    I really need to compile all of the email exchanges I had today. Pretty damn hilarious stuff in there. I put one exchange up on my blog at PokerSavvy.

    Thanks again for coming out for the tourney - good times.


    By Blogger pokersavvy, at 4/12/2006 4:28 AM  

  • Some trollers still got in... That assshole SUNIT who was being a dick to everyone wasn't a blogger. And I'm not sure if gunsandpoker, who got down to the final two (and maybe won it all) was a blogger. it is fucked up.

    but that was funny dude...

    By Blogger TripJax, at 4/12/2006 12:29 PM  

  • Donkey #2 sounded like Yoda.

    By Blogger Bloody P, at 4/12/2006 1:44 PM  

  • Classic. Nice job Matt.

    By Blogger drewspop, at 4/12/2006 2:39 PM  

  • Hysterical! Good stuff, Matt. Right up my alley, humor-wise.

    By Blogger HighOnPoker, at 4/13/2006 4:34 PM  

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